For your viewing pleasure

It's been at least a few hours since the last time you saw a funny Japanese TV show on Youtube, so here ya go:



Soccer with binoculars. Where do they come up with this stuff?

The Blazer's streak (from SI.com)

PORTLAND, Ore. (AP) -- When top draft pick Greg Oden was lost for the season because of knee surgery, many wrote off the Portland Trail Blazers. Now, the NBA's youngest team is proving it can do fine without him.

The Blazers have won nine straight, the longest current winning streak in the NBA after the Boston Celtics lost at home to the Detroit Pistons on Wednesday night.

Portland (14-12) rallied to beat the Toronto Raptors 101-96 to extend the streak, the team's longest since it won 12 straight during the 2001-02 season. The Blazers will try to extend the streak Friday night when they host the Denver Nuggets.

Portland started the streak with a win Dec. 3 at Memphis, after going 5-12 to start the season. Six of the nine wins have come at home, where the Blazers are 11-3.

Portland has not been three games above .500 since April 10, 2004.

The Blazers themselves seem a bit surprised by their success.

"It's hard to say. I think early maybe it was a hot streak," guard Brandon Roy said. "But I think now we are getting confident, and we are getting better. I think now people kind of want to see us lose to see how we respond, to see were they really that good or were they just riding a wave?"

Roy is one of the primary reasons the Blazers are winning.

Last season's Rookie of the Year has been averaging 24.2 points a game during the streak. He has been named the Western Conference player of the week the past two weeks.

Against Toronto, he was battling the flu and hadn't eaten for two days, but still managed 25 points, nine rebounds and eight assists. In the third quarter on a driving layup he switched the ball from his right hand to his left in midair, a stunning move that left coach Nate McMillan commenting: "It was like Michael Jordan in the NBA finals."

The crowd at the Rose Garden chanted: "MVP! MVP!"(click title to go to full article.)

Hey P-town!

I'm moving to Portland!

(What??)

I still kind of can't believe it, but I just locked in a sublet in downtown, starting December 1st. Holy shit, kids, it's actually happening!

Good Cop Bad Cop. Funny or Die

This made me sad til I read the last line!

Columbus, OH (AP) - A seven-year old boy was at the center of a Franklin County courtroom drama yesterday when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy has a history of being beaten by his parents and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody law and regulation requiring that family unity be maintained to the highest degree possible.

The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents and he adamantly refused to live with her. When the judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy cried and said that they also beat him.

After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him.

After two recesses to check legal references and confer with the Child welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the University of Michigan Wolverines, whom the boy firmly believes are not capable of beating anyone.

grandaddy of invention: Edison

Declaration

I just wanted to say...

I heart Portland. For realsies.

Portland, here I come!

Heads up to ya'll Portland kids: I'm going to be in P-town from August 25th to Sept 3rd. I'm in a wedding (yikes!) so I'm not sure how my schedule is gonna look, but I know I'll have some sort of free time and I'd love to catch up and maybe get a meal or a drink somewheres. Afterwards, I'm headed up to Seattle to see the siblings, but I may stick around because Velella is playing a Portland show on Sept 7th at the Holocene. More details to come. Can't wait! The weather here is hitting triple digits. WTF?!?

Thought this was a Good One!

OHIO Friends!!Why OHIO friends are the best.. and this is sooo effin true! :)

OTHER FRIENDS: Never ask for food
Ohio FRIENDS: Are the reason you have no food.

OTHER FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr. and Mrs.
OHIO FRIENDS: Call your parents mom and dad.

OTHER FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.
OHIO FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you saying, Damn...we fucked up...but that shit was fun!"

OTHER FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
OHIO FRIENDS: Cry with you.

OTHER FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
OHIO FRIENDS: Keep your stuff so long they forget it's yours.

OTHER FRIENDS: know a few things about you.
OHIO FRIENDS: Could write a book with direct quotes from you.

OTHER FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that's what the crowd is doing.
OHIO FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.

OTHER FRIENDS: Would knock on your door.
OHIO FRIENDS: Walk right in and say, "I'm home!"

OTHER FRIENDS: Are for a while.
OHIO FRIENDS: Are for life.

OTHER FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you've had enough.
OHIOFRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say, "Bitch, you better drink the rest of that, you know we don't waste!!"

OTHER FRIENDS: Will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you.
OHIO FRIENDS: Will knock them the fuck out!!

OTHER FRIENDS: Will ignore this.
OHIO FRIENDS: Will repost this

Ultimate Transplant

The value of my house just went up a few thousand dollars because GREG ODEN is moving to town. We all know that natives love Ohioans, but now the have a reason to not actually move to Ohio. I know you were thinking about it when you saw LeBron James make the Pistons look limp. Just wait...next June you can see LeBron and Oh-den square off in the ultimate battle of Transplants Vs Native in next years NBA finals, with the Blazers winning of course. Winning championships is not what Cleveland is about, but getting close is.

Who doesn't love cute animals?

This may just be the cutest 26 seconds of your day.

p.s. - Mr. Fancypants lost his case! Yay for justice.

4th of July

Hi All,Don't know what all's going on for the 4th of July, but i DO know that some lucky ones have the day off. Erin and I are moving into our new place this Sunday, Right downtown on the water, and RIGHT by the fireworks, and we were thinking about having everybody over to check out the new digs have some drinks, make some food, and walk down to see the fireworks. The More the Merrier. I'm thinking around 6 for food and drink and then walk down to the water to stake out a spot.I would post this on the transplant/native blog, but the blog won't let me. Interested? Hit me up so that we know what to expect.
Brian

New Releases

White Stripes out now, Nine in Nails out now, Queens of the Stone Age out now, Smashing Pumpkins 7/10, Interpol 7/10, Social Distortion (greatest hits) 6/26, Tupac early tapes out now, Killers out now, Kings of leon out now, Marilyn Manson out now, Tori Amos out now, !!! out now, Ataxia (John Frusciante) out now, Metric 6/26, Pearl Jam Live at the Gorge 6/26, Iron and Wine 7/10.

Did I leave anyone out?

Mr. Fancy Pants

Did you hear the one about the judge who's suing a dry cleaner for $54 million for misplacing his pants? No, seriously. Like for reals. Well the trial started on Tuesday... and he's already cried in court. He's also called a witness, an 89-year-old woman, who compared the Korean dry cleaners to Nazi Germany. Also, the judge for the trial is named Judith. You put that one together.

Now if only I was able to help the dry cleaners with their legal bills. Oh wait...

*Insert sardonic comment about our crumbling joke of a legal system here*

p.s. In case that wasn't enough comic relief for you, please to enjoy...

3 wishes (from the rare "viewer mail" episode)

This is not playoff highlights. Its from just last night's game 5.

The Nightwatchman tickets

You may not know him as The Nightwatchman. He is the One Man Revolution. You may know him as Tom Morello. You may know him as the guitarist of Audioslave. You may know him as the guitarist of Rage Against the Machine. http://www.nightwatchmanmusic.com/

The Nightwatchman is playing Doug Fir lounge on July 17 for $16. Tickets are on sale now. click the title of this post to go buy tickets. I already got mine.

Happy Birthday Katie!!!!!

So she is probably going to kick my ass for this one but it's a favorite of mine. Katie hammered in a random bathroom in Boulder, CO. BEST!

Reason for this killer pic is that Katie's ass is getting old, as in 28 years old. So let's celebrate! Cory has drained, scrubbed and refilled the pool. Party is Saturday May 26th (Her actual birthday). 3pm is the time bring your suit, your beverage of choice and something to grill out. If you want to bring a side that would be great!

Y'all should know where Cory lives but if you need the address shoot me an email. See you there!

Memorial Day Weekend!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sooooooooooo. This weekend is Memorial Day and normally there is a ton going on. But aside from Spoon on Friday night, which is "going to rock your socks," I haven't heard of any plans. So whats the word?

Fun times for Friday

Like, seriously. The guy with the afro is priceless.

p.s. This is nearly as awesome: The Real Ultimate Britney

Spoon and Doug Fir EQUALS Insanely Good Times

Yup, that's right. Spoon is coming to the Doug Fir. And they're playing two weekend nights 5/25 and 5/26!!! I have provided a link to buy tickets. I'm going Friday, and I can't believe tickets are still available. Jump on it...

Jared's Actual BDay @ Todai Sushi buffet downtown

So Jared and I were talking and he would like to do a dinner get together on Thursday, his actual Birthday. We are going to meet at 7pm at Todai at 340 SW Morrison St # 3Portland, OR 97204.
They have all you can eat sushi and validated parking if you park across the street. We may hit up a movie after. And still on for Saturday. Let me know who is coming so we have enough seats! (the post title is a link)

Happy Birthday BBQ!!!

Sooo Jared is turning 29 next Thursday and we want to celebrate!!!
BBQ Party at the new house 7130 E Burnside Street 97215 at 2pm on Saturday May 19th.
We will have corn hole, flip cup and grillin out. BYOB and Pot lock, although I will get some cheapo beer for clip cup.
After we will go out to the bars.
Hope to see you all there!
And Happy Early Birthday Muffin!

Former Form-Wed.

Hey all,

Former Form and A Gatherin' Storm are playing at the know on NE Alberta & 20th this Wednesday night -
MAY 9


The show starts at 8pm..

How to get rocked on May 11th

Velella Velella
w/ Point Juncture, WA
Holocene - 1001 SE Morrison
9PM
Five bucks!

Velella Velella, out of Seattle, has quickly become one of my favorite bands in the past year, and they put on a *GREAT* live show. Loads of instruments-- clavinets! vibes! synthesizers! And totally dance-y, yet not cheesy. You may just enjoy yourselves. Go here to hear a lil' bit (their full site is getting revamped).

p.s. This is part of a west coast tour, including shows in LA, Reno and Yakima... details on their website.

p.p.s. The really cute girl in Velella is my sister Sylvia... of course. :D

Cinco de Mayo 4:30-5 start time

La Calaca Comelona 2304 Se Belmont St. Portland, OR 97214 - Google Maps This link has everything you need to know about the location of our start to Cinco de Mayo. Everything. After this, who knows. Thanks Kristen! Post your comments by clicking on the link below, instead of emailing each other.

"The Landlord"

Saturday Evening Celebration

Not nearly as fun as a bong-a-thon

... in fact, not fun at all :(. Don't mean to rain on the bong parade, but remember my friend Mark, the one who was shot and robbed and ended up with a huge, uninsured stack of hospital bills? Well, a few weeks ago, just when he was scheduled to start his physical therapy, he was informed by his doctors that his arm didn't set properly and they'd have to re-break it and reset it for it to heal. At the same time, he found out failed to qualify for state disability. In a nutshell: He's screwed. Really, truly screwed.

Fear not, kids, there's a positive end to this post. If you know anyone in the L.A. area, Mark's friends are hosting an auction/party in Culver City on his behalf. One of many sweet items being auctioned is two 10-hour days in a recording studio with a sound engineer. Got any budding musician friends?

Event: Art & Wine Auction and Party!!
Host: Laura Clive / Mark Huddleston
Location: Richard Ruthsatz Studio @ Helm's Bakery, 8731 Washington Blvd, Culver City, CA (map)
When: Sunday, April 22, 3:00pm
Phone: (310) 404 7422

Lastly, I usually hate asking for help like this, but seeing my friend in such a helpless situation makes my tummy hurt. I kindly ask you to spread the word, and if you have a little change in your pocket, he could use any little bitty bits he can get. http://www.markhuddlestonrelieffund.com

Thank you and goodnight!

2nd Annual 4/20 Bong-A-Thon

WHAT: 2007 4/20 Bong-a-thon

WHO: YOU and three other teammates

WHERE: 6107 N GREELEY

WHAT TIME: 8:40pm (4:20 x 2)

HOW: AN EIGHTH & A BONG

WHY: Well, I wasn't gonna have it but due to last year's controversial decision and people unable to participate, I've had an overwhelming amount of requests to give the 2nd annual 4/20 Bong-a-thon another heave-ho.

For those who don't know what happened last year (or can't remember), the team of Gaelen, Dan, Stephanie, and Rob had finished their 1/8 first but left a bit of ash on their plate. Our judge, Ms. Genevieve, told them they had to smoke the ash...of which the team thought was absurd. Finishing directly after the decision, Cory, Jared, Jeff, and Thomas cashed their last bowl, no ash in sight, with a time just over 20 minutes and thus was declared winners. Due to the controversial call, a new rule has been instated and we'll just go ahead and declare it rule #1...

Rule #1: A team member must clear the bowl through the slide to the water. If a team member can't clear his/her own pull, it must be passed on to the next teammate (or to a teammate who is capable).

Rule #2: One poker allowed per team

Rule #3: All teams must have identical greenage and bongs will be inspected upon entry.

Entry fee is $10 per person, and last year we had a random drawing to determine teams and bong choice. We figured that was the best way to keep the best tokers from forming a team, but I am open to keep couples on the same team.

WE NEED SOME JUDGES, so if you don't smoke, perfect...but go ahead and pass this event on to people who might be interested. In your RSVP, please indicate if you have a bong (or multiple bongs), a means to get bulk and when you can get me cash (the day of the event is ok...sometime before 8:40 though as I might forget). If I don't get enough responses or enough bongs, then I'm simply not having it...but fuck it...I'll have a 4/20 party anyway.

Jesse

TIPS

If you have a job like me, co-workers come over to ask for this and that all the time. I just came up with a solution to turn a profit on it. I just set up a "tip jar" at my cube. I already made about 10 cents in the first five minutes, so we're lookin good! Maybe I can get an xbox sooner than I thought. Sweeeet!
By the way, does anyone want to see Grindhouse some time afterwork on Friday?

MetroFi, Portland's free Wi-fi

Portland has some Wi-Fi, or "whifee,"as Erik Arnett would call it, access points set up and will have more to come. Here's where they are. Click the title to go check your neighborhood for free internet. You get what you pay for, so don't expect it be able to do much but read and email on it for now. It ain't for gaming and youtube.

A festival worth seeing

Seatlle's Bumbershoot is looking good to me. Its over labor day and there are discounts now.

The full-flavored list of cross-genre musical artists scheduled to perform at the 2007 Bumbershoot includes:

The Shins, Wu-Tang Clan, Panic! At The Disco, Crowded House, Lupe Fiasco, Steve Earle DeVotchKa, Devendra Banhart, Gogol Bordello, Kill Hannah, Norma Jean, Plain White T's, The Gourds, Lyrics Born, Roky Erickson & The Explosives The Holmes Brothers, The Avett Brothers, Yungchen Lhamo, Allison Moorer, Magnolia Electric Company The Aggrolites. Wu Tang Investments, what!

Go BUCKS!!!!

Where we watching this matchup today?!?! Shnozzy Osborne's?!

Buy you a beer

If you can come up with something good to do tonight, the first round is on me.

I got you now, NYTimes.com...

If you're a reader of NYTimes.com, you're about to make me your BFF. If you still have a .edu email address, there's a student/teacher deal that gets you the "Times Select" (paid subscription) material for FREE. Get all the Maureen Dowd, Paul Krugman and archives your heart desires, via The Consumerist. Don't know about yous guys, but I frequently abuse my student ID card for movies and such, even though I graduated nearly 6 years ago. Asians age well, what can I say?

p.s. The Consumerist is an excellent site for all things corporate-screwed-you-over-and-you-want-revenge. Lots of handy-dandy info.

p.s. For hallucinatory fun without the chemicals, check this out.

I love bacon

Click the title if you like dumb shit to laugh at.

Buckeyes in a bar?

I'll bet UCLA is on and not OSU tonight. Does anyone plan on watching the game somewhere?

Heal your ears.

(Link above)I guess this would be a perfect time to mention that Modest Mouse came out with an album today, "we were dead before the ship even sank". You guys probably need to listen to this to rid yourself of the Timberlake taint in your mind.

Its a really freakin' good album. The lineup for the album is a little different than "good music for people who like bad music" The Shins singer is on several songs doing backing vocals. The have also added the Smiths guitar player as a permanent member. I never listened to them, but he's good on this album. There is even more depth in this album, which is hard to say because the last one had a lot too. You'll also hear some rough madness from the singer too. Every track is solid.

I saw them live in Portland last week in a venue comparable to The Newport. This was the 2nd show of the tour. They were not nearly as drunk as they were the first time I saw them there. This is their hometown. They actually wrote and rehearsed these songs a 13 blocks from my house.

For your convenience(and mine)

Thursday March 22, 2007
Time
7:10 pm Southern Ill. #4 Kansas #1
7:27 pm Texas A&M #3 Memphis #2
9:40 pm Pittsburgh #3 UCLA #2
9:57 pm Tennessee #5 Ohio St. #1

Friday March 23, 2007
Time
7:10 pm Butler #5 Florida #1
7:27 pm Vanderbilt #6 Georgetown #2
9:40 pm UNLV #7 Oregon #3
9:57 pm Southern Cal #5 North Carolina #1

I'm 3rd in my office pool.

Two very captivating items

I'll start with the good news: My brother Ted and sister Sylvia have a T-shirt company called A Priceless Way. They just put up their website this weekend, and I'm so effing proud of them that the news is just falling out of my mouth like an overflowing jar of Jelly Bellies. Please to peek! Even just so you can see some funny Engrish (yes, Engrish) designs.
www.apricelessway.com

Now the bad news: My friend Mark was shot and robbed in Venice, CA a few months ago (I know, way to bring down the tone, Ingrid). He got out of the hospital last month, he has no insurance and is looking at 4 months of physical therapy just to get back to work. So his friend set up a relief fund for him. Can I just say that it's weird that I have a friend who was shot? I'm still baffled. Anyway, check out his site too, and spread the word if you can.
www.markhuddlestonrelieffund.com

While I'm on the topic of bad news, I baked four loaves of banana bread and forgot to take them out of the pans to cool. They turned into bricks. It's the first time ever that I've messed up a batch of banana bread... Just waiting for another bunch of bananas to ripen so I can do it proper this time.

Straight from the source.

North Eugene is Colby's alma mater. The boys basketball team just won the (state) championship. click the title for the story. Congratulations!

It was a good weekend for basketball fans in Eugene this weekend the Ducks had thier first blowouts of the season to win the Pac-10 tournaments with style. For example, Bryce Taylor (this is copied from ESPN.com) Taylor went 11-for-11 from the field, 7-for-7 from 3-point range and 3-for-3 from the line before being removed with 6 1/2 minutes left and the Ducks ahead by 39 points. I've never heard of anyone doing that before.

Oh, The Ohio State University won the Big10 tournament with several blowouts all season long. But, that's not really news though.

Happy hour?

Its friday. So, we drink. How soon? Soon. Ideas?

St. Patty's Day Debauchery

So I'm having a party on St. Patty's Day! I know, I know...you're probably like Yun and St. Patty's Day don't go together, but I tell you what, I sure can get down like I'm an Irishman on this special holiday. So anyway, I'm thinking a potluck around 6...and not 6:30...6 on the nose. I know how you Portlanders roll, with your 1/2 hour late bullshit. Did you know in Peru that the average time people are late to appointments, etc. is 1 and 1/2 hrs. That's fucking real late and a real stat! So anyway, I figure some of you Irish people will be drunker than all hell by that time...but hopefully we have nice weather and I can grill something (a day like today would be ideal). So the tentative plan is to eat, drink, and be merry...or fight...and then go to some bar other than Kell's (no offense).

The roommate situation: Justin will be snowboarding in Whisler and McCormick (the actual Irishman) is on the wagon for the month...

My Birthday Party Round Two

The band, Chronicle, that played on my birthday is going to play this Thursday the 8th at the Goodfoot. They are the headliner and start at 10 pm. I don't know what the cover will be but I am sure it's under $10. Looks like I might have to take off Friday, see you there!

My 90 seconds of fame

I am hereby known throughout the nation of New Zealand as the girl who got hit in the head five times in a single dodgeball game.

Did you know I played dodgeball religiously in LA? Well this dude from Radio New Zealand National came to a game one night to do some interviews and get some audio, and... well, why don't you take a listen?

I'm clumsy, what can I say...

And it keeps on keepin' on...

I figured I should probably introduce myself, as you may be wondering, 'Who's this "ing-rad" character who keeps posting and claims to be a banana bread whore?' This is me (get yer SpySpace on). And this is me too (get yer eats on). What? It's me again! (get yer Flickr on).

Jared took that picture of me, so I feel obligated to share. Yes, that's Ron Jeremy's handwriting on my boob. What a weird night at Berbati's. That's the only time I ever let myself get fondled in public, but I figured it was nothing after seeing shapely women and fat men flailing naked on stage. What's a harmless boob grab from a porn star?

Nice to meet ya! I'm really not a narcissist or a whore, I swear. But I do like my banana bread...

Studio 1050 blows. I'm just sayin'.

Ever plan a Portland wedding from Tokyo? Well me neither, but my best friend is, and Studio 1050 on the SE waterfront, where they booked their wedding reception, screwed them out of their deal. The owners are having problems with the city or something, so the landlord canceled ALL scheduled events. Capital L-A-M-E.

Next question: Ever been to a Portland wedding reception you loved? Or liked? Or at least appreciated? Maybe you hated the people but liked the space? You see where I'm going.

Unfortunately my friend can't visit all the places she wants to check out, but she's found three places she's considering: Lawrence Gallery, World Forestry Center, and North Star Ballroom. My thought is there might be hidden gems out there somewhere... big enough for 120 people in September...

I'm assuming most of you are dudes, so I'm not expecting much, but I'll send banana bread to the best reply. Shit, I'll send banana bread anyway. I'm a banana bread whore.

Reconnecting to your nerdy side

Do you like nerds, computers, the Internets, the 90's, Care Bears, math and weird romance?

Then you'll love xkcd!

I'm partial, so far, to Ninja Turtles, Mario and The 90's Flowchart.

Happy Friday.

LOOK OUT DUCKS! (Mother nature's revenge)

I didn't even know that they were missing, but apparently they're back. The first beaver has been spotted in NYC since the 1800s. Man was winning its long standing battle vs. nature, but it seems we slipped. 200 hundred years was a good run, but apparently mother nature has gathered reinforcements.
The beavers are back! The implications of this are too much to fathom. Have you seen Planet of the Apes? Well, that's what's going to happen if we don't gather up our courage and our muskets and fight back. Let's make this one into a hat!! His one here is named Jose and he is large and in charge. Who knows how many friends he has and how pissed off they are. I'm glad I'm over here in Oregon living, hand in hand with the beavers. Here's more... http://news.mongabay.com/2007/0223-beaver.html

Sasquatch 2007 Line Up Announced!

Saturday, May 26th
Bjork
The Arcade Fire
Manu Chao Radio Bemba Sound System (Awesome Mexican Hip Hop!)
M.I.A.
Citizen Cope
Neko Case
The Hold Steady
Grizzly Bear
Ghostland Observatory
Electrelane
Two Gallants
The Slip
Lonely, Dear
Aqueduct
The Thermals
Viva Voce
The Blow
Gabriel Teodros

Sunday, May 27th
Beastie Boys
Interpol
Michael Franti & Spearhead
Spoon
Bad BRains
Ozomatli
Dandy Warhols
Mirah
Tokyo Police Club
Money Mark
St. Vincent
Jesse Sykes & The Sweet Hereafter
Smoosh
Common Market
Helio Sequence
Minus th Bear

Tickets go on sale Sat. March 3 at 10:00 AM.

Todd's 30th Birthday!

Let's vote like good Americans!

Are you reading this?
	Yes, but not posting.
	Yes, I want to join
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	No... wait... how did I know to say no?
pollcode.com free polls

Wanna see all these bands in one event? I DO!

The Police · Tool · Widespread Panic · The White StripesBen Harper & the Innocent Criminals · Wilco · The Flaming Lips Manu Chao Radio Bemba Sound System · The String Cheese Incident Franz Ferdinand · Bob Weir & Ratdog · Damien Rice · Ween · Gov't Mule Ziggy Marley · The Decemberists · Kings of Leon · Michael Franti & SpearheadWolfmother · Regina Spektor · The Black Keys · Galactic · The Black KeysDJ Shadow · Gillian Welch · Spoon · Keller Williams (WMD's) Sasha & John Digweed · STS9 · Old Crow Medicine Show · The Hold SteadyNorth Mississippi Allstars · Fountains Of Wayne · Hot Tuna · Feist · Hot ChipLily Allen · John Butler Trio · Ralph Stanley & the Clinch Mountain BoysAesop Rock · The Richard Thompson Band · Dierks Bentley · Xavier RuddGogol Bordello · Junior Brown · Tortoise · T-Bone Burnett · Mavis StaplesClutch · Cold War Kids · Dr. Dog · Paolo Nutini · Brazilian GirlsRX Bandits · The Nightwatchman · The Slip · Girl Talk · Railroad EarthMartha Wainwright · Rodrigo y Gabriela · Annuals · Tea Leaf GreenSam Roberts Band · Elvis Perkins in Dearland · Charlie Louvin · Sonya KitchellMute Math · Apollo Sunshine · Uncle Earl · James Blood Ulmer · The NationalThe Little Ones · Black Angels · Ryan ShawComedians:Lewis Black & Friends · David Cross · Dave Attell

Drinking

The Value of a Drink "Sometimes when I reflect back on all the wine I drink I feel shame, Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the vineyards and all of their hopes and dreams .. If I didn't drink this wine, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this wine and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver." ~ Jack Handy WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra and panties. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day " ~Frank Sinatra WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading." ~ Henny Youngman WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?I think not." ~ Stephen Wright WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!" ~ Brian O'Rourke WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." ~ Benjamin Franklin WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza." ~ Dave Barry WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ To some ! it's a six-pack, to me it's a Support Group. Salvation in a can! ~Dave Howell WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ And saving the best for last, as explained by Cliff Clavin,of Cheers. One afternoon at Cheers, Cliff Clavin was explaining the Buffalo Theory to his buddy Norm. Here's how it went: "Well ya see, Norm, it's like this... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers." WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

Todd's 30th Birthday

Hey all,

Try to be there around 8. I am paying for the band, but the bar is still open to the public, so if we are there early then we can take it over! Plus the place isn't that big and will fill up fast. Also I am paying $700 for the band to play 3 hours starting at 9, so I am asking for donations around $10 a piece to cover it. See ya soon!

Modest Mouse at the Crystal Ballroom.

I refuse to put a link to Ticketbastard on the site, but that's where I got my tickets. The rape charge is something like $8.50. The Show is March 14th and the tickets went on sale on
Saturday(yesterday). Ali, Caleb, Jessie and I got 'em. Good luck getting yours. We got tix for the THURSDAY show.

Fashion and Rock show at The Crystal(Fri night)

http://www.mcmenamins.com/index.php?loc=2&id=81&eventid=47788 Here's a link to the event. The bands are good and the price is cheap. I'd be down.

Mardi Gras Party

Sooo Kristen and I will be having a party aswell as most of you know via the Evite. But I haven't had a reason to Post and now I do! Yay!
So it is on Saturday Feb 24th at give or take 8pm. It is for Mardi Gras and it is formal. We are also asking that in the tradition of Carnival, everyone wear a mask. And No, Jared, Dick Chaney can't come out and play! We will have beer and food but you can bring whatever beverage you choose. Hope to see everyone there!

Todd's 30th Birthday

You are invited to my 30th Birthday, February 17th (Saturday night) at the Tiger Bar;
317 NW Broadway Portland, OR 97209, 503-467-4111, it is downtown. Yes, I am getting old, Thanks! I thought that I would get that out of the way. Anyway I want you all to come help me celebrate! I am going to have local band Chronicle play. Check out their myspace page for a taste of goodness;
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=68019194

Please RSVP, so I can give the bar an idea of how crazy this is going to be! I hope you can all make it because this is going to be one hell of a party!!! Come one, come all, bring anyone you want.
See you there,
Old man Todd

Indianapolis Unicorns Win!

Well, congratulations to all of you Indianapolis fans. Wait...there is no such thing as an Indianapolis fan, just like there is no such thing as a Unicorn (I think). So, nevermind.

The Bears will Win the Super Bowl...

and I will put money on it if I have to...Game watching will be on HD at Cory's. Leftover vodka from the party is present, and I am getting drunk today...so please join me in that exciting endeavor! Want to say thanks to all who showed up at Pete and my bday party! A good time is an understatement...as it was filled with everything I dreamed of and then some.

A quick congrats to the ladies who ended up coming back on the guys in the battle of the sexes match-up in flip-cup. And then props to the Ohio transplants for beating the non-Ohioans...which naturally wasn't even close. Beer pong died early on, but it was a worthy cause.

The highlight of the night was definitely Pete's performance. Pete juggled fire (drunk I might add) with some dude, and even though almost burned a hole in the pool cover, it was very impressive. Pete then proceeded to juggle the fire and then unicycle around the pool with only a remote control's (balance beam analogy) worth of space, only to drop one of the fire sticks in the bushes, causing a small fire that was immediately extinguished by Pete, who had to stop on a dime and get his stomp on. Astute reaction there...Oh, and I almost forgot, he blew a plume of fire like he was frolicking in the autumn mist...

As far as the rest of the night, complete blur. All I know is we didn't have enough mixers, which led to taking more shots, and then debauchery. Could've had more of a dance party, but it was certainly fun for all who participated. The sticky floor didn't help the cause, but a little more liquor on the floor (for the homies of course) helped a bit...temporarily.

Well, hope to c u at Cory's for the game....Da Bears, da Bears, da Bears....

Groundhog Day Formality

I have determined I have a mental issue with Friday. It would be wise for me to sleep in on Friday's for the next year. I'm not gonna work, go out, and as a matter of fact, I'm going to drive out in the country and start a fire...not a forest fire...a personal fire. I'm going to ponder this some more...but in the mean time, I want to tell you that I'm stoking the fire in my soul about this Friday's Age of Aquarius party! It's not only a birthday party for all AquaRi-eyes...but it's also Groundhog Day! This stupid tradition means nothing to me but groundhogs are certainly the most fuckable forest animal out there. Kidding of course, but they sure would be a good fuck. Okay, okay, so the people out there that still have the stomach to respect good shock value when you see it, the is party is goin' down at Cory's aka Shnozzy's palace, which is located at 5029 NE 34th. Corner of 34th & Webster, in between Alberta and Killingsworth. We will be a devising a team that will buy liquor...as team A, team B will buy mixers, and team C will buy the beer for flip-cup (although flip-cup with liquor is one helluvan idea...not to mention a scary and unpredictable outcome). Shnozzy Osbourne has recently purchased a plasma screen and XBOX 360...so if anyone wants to lose in NBA 2k6, come early to the party. For the rest of the night, I envision socializing, wishing the hot tub was working, beer pong, flying birds, teaching the natives how to play flip-cup, and then actually playing flip-cup...and then dance the night away to songs like "Regulators" and then naturally to songs like "Don't Stop Til You Get Enough"...subsequently a dance-off! Elizabeth holds the current crown from Kristen's party last year...but she's going down...indeed...to me!

Tram

The tram idea was Jason McCormick's idea, bitches. That's all you need to know. Fuck off....and then you will know what happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass.

Email from Kristen about "Transplants"

If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't work there.
If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time.
If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number.
If "Vacation" means going anywhere south of Philadelphia for the weekend.
If you measure distance in hours.
If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once.
If you have switched from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back.
If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching.
If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked.
If you carry jumpers in your car and your wife knows how to use them.
If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph -- you're going 80 and everybody is passing you.
If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.
If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction.
If you have more miles on your snow blower than your car.
If you find 10 degrees "a little chilly”.

Oh, you want a goddamn show?! Booyah...that's right I said Booyah, it's on it's way back

In 26 years, I have never written these words in a blog, but here they are: you owe it to yourself to go to this festival.

shows, shows and more shows.

Lots of entertainment in P-town in the next few weeks, starting...tomorrow.

First, the Auto show stars this thursday. I'm going and I think Caleb and Todd said they were planning on going. Anyone else? Its $10 but you can probably find a coupon out there if you really need one. They have motorcycles this year...real freaky ones. http://www.paragonexpo.com/201.html

Next is a free show at the Crystal Ballroom this Sunday, 1/28/07. That Mofo is 93 years old!!! So, they're throwing a party. Menomena will be there celebrating the release of a new ablum. If like Radiohead, and you haven't seen this band, you're dumb. Sorry, don't cry, just go see them. Jesse and I are going to that one. He went last year and said everything is free?!?!? www.danceonair.com

In a few weeks there is a show on Jesse's B-day. Its his favorite band for this second and you all got an email about it. "Of Montreal" is the name. I trust his judgement, but I haven't seen them yet- so I'm going. It's at the Wonder Ballroom. Nice place to see a show and have a B-day. That one is on 2/6/07.

wid

Ali wants to know what a wid is and why? Please comment.

I'm in baby! Let's get T&N blogging...

Phew, I hope nobody has as much trouble as I did to find out how to start this blog-o-rama. If you have problems, then email Jared...he had to send an invite to contribute to the blog.

Well, I'd like to start by saying Happy New Year! I had a rockin' good time at the Kennedy School...it was like Vegas, but indoors! Dr. Theopolis puts on a great live show...perfect for NYE. Speaking of live shows, there's a couple coming up. My Morning Jacket, who was hands-down the best performance of Bonarroo 2004, is playing at The Crystal Ballroom on Tues. January 9th. Jared, Ali and I already have tickets to that....and I just checked and I think they're sold out...so sorry to rub that one in...February 6th, a very important date as it is my bday...Of Montreal is playing at the Wonder Ballroom. If you don't know, www.ofmontreal.net or www.myspace.com/ofmontreal

Plus, it's my bday so you have to go!

January 13th, next Saturday, Francie is having a GOING AWAY PARTY AT MY HOUSE! This is going to be a party of everyone and anyone Francie and I know...so it should be huge. Oh, and by the way, she's moving to S Korea to join Molly and her Asian-wannabe lifestyle.

Next Monday...The Buckeyes destroy the Gators. Kickoff is at 5:05pm. Seats to be reserved at The City Sportsbar at around 2 or 2:30! I'm getting off work early and so should you...